If you are involved in custody litigation or co-parenting with a former spouse or partner, you may have heard of parental alienation. The term refers to actions by one parent that are intentionally designed to break down the children’s relationship with the other parent.
What’s scary about parental alienation is that, many times, it works. Children are extremely impressionable and often take what they hear from a parent as truth.
Additionally, parental alienation is often difficult to prove. The wishes of the children are one factor Texas courts consider when making custody decisions. If children are vehemently insisting that they do not want to live with one parent, a court will listen, particularly in situations where the children are older or can express themselves in a mature manner.
Proving parental alienation
Detailed documentation is essential to prove parental alienation. You must be ready to provide details about specific changes in children’s behavior, when they started and how they impacted your relationship.
Witnesses are often crucial to proving parental alienation. Speak with your children’s teachers or anyone who they are close to and determine if they have noticed any changes. Sometimes you might need to secure an expert witness.
Combating parental alienation
Even if you prove parental alienation, it is hard to find a solution to the problem. You can start by talking to your co-parent about it. If that does not work, start modeling the behavior you would like to see from them. Honor your custody arrangement and maintain a peaceful, respectful co-parenting relationship.
Consider counseling with a focus on repairing the damage done. Do not blame your child. Be patient and recognize that rebuilding your relationship will take time.
Effects of parental alienation
Parental alienation harms more than just you. It has a negative effect on children, frequently causing depression, anxiety and low self-esteem.
As children grow older, their sense of identify forms and they begin to see themselves as a mixture of each parent. If one parent is constantly talking negatively about the other parent and telling the child how bad the parent is, this will necessarily have a negative impact on the child.